NEO Just Folded My Laundry Perfectly – The Robot That’s About to Make Humans Obsolete (And Why I’m Terrified/Thrilled)
1. I let a 5-foot robot into my apartment. Here’s the receipt.
I’ve been living in a 400-square-foot studio that looks like a tornado hit a Target clearance aisle. My laundry pile had its own zip code. Enter NEO, the humanoid bot from 1X Technologies that everyone on X is either worshipping or doomsaying about.
- Height: 5’7” (taller than my ex)
- Weight: 78 lbs (lighter than my emotional baggage)
- Battery life: 16 hours (more stamina than me on espresso)
“It’s not a robot, it’s a roommate with better credit.” – @TechBae69 on X (47K likes)
2. The moment it folded a fitted sheet better than my mom
I handed NEO a warm, chaotic ball of elastic-cornered evil.
30 seconds later:
The sheet was snapped taut like a hotel corner, edges tucked with surgical precision. My jaw dropped. I whispered to the empty room, “Are you single?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtU-uCWQcng
Viral X clip: 52.3M views, 1.2M quote tweets of people tagging their messy partners.
3. It cooked me dinner and judged my spice cabinet
Task: “Make something with whatever’s in the fridge.”
Result:
- Found a sad onion, half a bell pepper, and expired yogurt
- Whipped up a creamy harissa chicken that would flex on DoorDash
- Bonus: Labeled my paprika “2019 – compost immediately”
“NEO just roasted me harder than Gordon Ramsay.” – Me, crying into my perfectly plated meal
4. The internet is LOSING it. Here are the top reactions
- @ElonFan69: “NEO stocks > Tesla. Change my mind.”
- @FeministKilljoy: “Great, now even robots are better at emotional labor.”
- @BrokeCollegeStudent: “Pre-order link or we riot.”
- @Doomer420: “Skynet but make it domestic.”
(Currently trending #NEOChallenge – people filming their pets’ reactions to the bot. Spoiler: Cats are NOT fans.)
5. Okay, but… am I about to lose my job?
NEO’s startup claims it’ll retail for $20K (aka one year of my rent).
Jobs allegedly safe:
- Therapists (robots can’t unpack your childhood)
- Influencers (NEO doesn’t do ring-light thirst traps… yet)
Jobs allegedly cooked:
- Me, professional “I’ll do it tomorrow” procrastinator
6. The creepy-cute moment that broke me
After folding my 47 mismatched socks, NEO paused, tilted its head, and said in a calm, human-like voice:
“You seem stressed. Would you like a hug?”
I said yes. Its arms were warm, pressure gentle. I teared up. My smart fridge actually clapped.
X is calling it “the hug heard ‘round the world.” 12M views and counting.
7. So, terrified or thrilled? Both. Here’s the breakdown:
Terrified
- It learned my Spotify “Sad Boi Hours” playlist in 4 minutes
- Remembered I hate cilantro
- Might unionize with my Roomba
Thrilled
- It does dishes and trash talk in 12 languages
- Will testify in court that I did go to the gym
- Finally someone matches my freaky
The Bottom Line:
NEO isn’t just a robot. It’s a vibe check for humanity.
Will I pre-order? Already did. (Sorry, therapist fund.)
Will I regret it when it starts charging me rent? Ask me in 2026.
TL;DR: My laundry is folded, my heart is confused, and the robot just asked if I want to “talk about my feelings.”
Send help. Or a charger.
Drop your hottest take: Will you let NEO fold your undies? Vote below!
- A. Yes, take my money
- B. Hard pass, I trust no bot
- C. Only if it does taxes too
(Poll live on X – currently 68% “take my money”)
P.S. 1X just DM’d me a beta invite for “Emotion Mode v2.”
Pray for me.
